Our entire family came down with the flu this week, all at the same time. It’s a horrible strain, one that the flu shot didn’t protect us from. My kids missed school all week, with the exception of Thursday afternoon when they went for their Valentine’s Day parties. (I did NOT send them to school sick. They both seemed to be feeling fine.) After three hours at school, they were completely drained of energy and ready to crawl into bed for the night. That seems to be how this strain works… it drains you of all energy while filling your head with wet sand. I wake up feeling decent, but by noon the world is tilting 45 degrees to the left.
Because of this, we are not going to church today. We didn’t go last week, because a few of the kids were starting to show symptoms. The week before we skipped our home ward to attend my niece’s baby blessing, and next week is Stake Conference, which means “church vacation” when you have an active 2-year-old and no nursery. That means we will have missed an ENTIRE MONTH of church in our home ward, and that makes me feel incredibly guilty.
Is it because I hold a leadership position in our ward and I feel like I need to set a better example? Is it because our four kids make up roughly one-fifth of the entire primary, so their absence is always felt? Is it because getting the family ready and out the door by 8:45 AM – by myself!- is such a daunting task I secretly look forward to having a “valid” excuse to stay home?
I am not in danger of becoming inactive. My future exaltation is not at stake because I missed three weeks of church. I am very, legitimately sick.
So why do I feel so guilty?