I committed my first vehicular homicide today.
It was purely accidental, and I’m sure I’ll have nightmares for the next few days about the sound of the body hitting my headlight, or the shuddery feel of the impact. The worst part about it was, I was driving too fast to stop, and driving on the freeway off-ramp was no place to pull over and check on the victim.
Poor little bird.
Here is the ironic part (hence, the title)– we were on our way back from a day trip to the zoo. All day with those animals, and what will I remember? The little birdie* who didn’t catch his up-draft fast enough and connected squarely with my front bumper. Even more ironic? We were blasting the Enchanted soundtrack and singing along to “Happy Working Song”, the one with all the animal helpers.
Vehicular birdicide. I feel sick.
*Eyewitness reports are mixed– my parents, driving in the car behind me, saw the whole thing. My sister wasted no time calling me on my cell phone to shout, “Crow Killer!” and hang up. (Soooo mature.) My dad said it looked like a little rooster Quail. Killing either species is horrifying, but we have dozens of Quail who live in our pine tree, so it feels more like killing a family member. Anyway, I was hopeful (and doubtful) that I had just grazed it and then it flitted off to be with its birdie friends, but no, Dad had to describe its ricochet and trajectory, and eventual resting spot. (Eventual = bouncing across five lanes of freeway space.) *cry* *vomit*