The title above would work nicely if this afternoon were suddenly made into a movie.
Alex invited a friend home from school, and another boy from their class showed up as well. (I get brownie points for letting him join the other two third-graders already running through my house, and not slamming the door in his face.) Luckily, they are all nine, and easily amused by Nintendo.
I found it very interesting, and equal parts humorous and disturbing, to learn that my son has another name he goes by at school. He is known as “Alex” only by his teachers, but to every other boy in the school, he’s known simply as “Dude”. They all are, apparently, because not once did I hear the names Alex, Chris or Christian. It was a chorus of “Dude!”, “Duuuuude”, “DUDE!!!” and “dude”. And now my ears are bleeding and my mind is reeling. I could have SWORN I named my firstborn Alex, and I’m very certain that the other dudes’ moms (oh look, now he’s got me saying it, too) also chose less generic titles for their offspring, but they seem to have forgotten what those titles are.
Did I miss something? When did they all turn TWELVE?
(My favorite use of the word “dude” I just heard was my son’s “Du-giggle, giggle, giggle- de”. As in, “Do-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-duh.” Hilarious! My son giggles like a girl.)
Just for kicks, I’m going to type VERBATIM, the next five “dudes” I hear:
1. “Dude, it’s because you’re in the lava.”
2. “Dude, you’re winning me! You’re making it too hard.”
3. “Yes we do, Dude… yes we do.” (Paging Ty Pennington…)
4. “Dude, where’s your bathroom?”
5. “Dude, how come there’s ballet shoes in your mom’s toilet?” (Thank you, Anthony. And thank you, Christian, for peeing on top of them. Grrrr…)
I’ve got to run. Apparently the dudes need some sweet snacks. Not sugary-sweet, but “dude”-sweet. Sweeeeeeeet.
That sound you hear is probably me, slamming my head in the cupboard door. Repeatedly.