I am determined to potty-train Anthony by the summer if it kills me. (It very likely will, so I want you to be prepared for my funeral.) He has been “interested” in using the potty for more than a year, but the minute he found out that I wanted him to do it, the training became more of a game. I have lost count of how many pairs of training pants he’s soiled just minutes after getting up from the potty, in acts of defiance. We’ve tried candy bribes, going potty for pennies (brilliant idea, btw), giving him Cheerios to “aim” for, choosing “big boy” underwear, begging, whining, yelling and crying. (Lots and LOTS of crying. From me, of course.)
The little stinker is completely unmoved. And unmotivated.
He’ll be going off to college in diapers, I’m afraid. (Although, it would completely serve him right.)
On Monday, I decided to get aggressive with the training. I made him strip from the waist down, which he hated, and he went bare all morning. He kept telling me, “Mom, this is as-gusting. I want pants.” He made it to the potty three times, and purposely had an “accident” on the floor, which I rewarded with a swat on his (bare!) bottom. [Mother’s note: Had it been a real accident, I would never have done that. This was deliberate.] He got a diaper for nap time, and went bare in the afternoon, until we went outside to play. He did pretty well, but complained constantly about being “naked and as-gusting”.
Yesterday was a potty no-go, as I was at the school and Kenny will have no part in potty-training, so this morning we started our second naked day. Anthony is furious with me, and has spent the better part of the morning wiping his (bare!) (clean!) bottom over every surface of the house and playing with his penis. And narrating every tug and tweak.
It makes me want to flush myself down the toilet.
What do you do with a willful three-year-old who knows what to do, but refuses? (Besides flush HIM down the toilet…)