Kemi, like “chemistry”

Random Musings of the Misunderstood

Impending Bloom May 1, 2013

Filed under: Kemi,motherhood,The Looney Bin — Kemi @ 1:31 pm
Tags: , , ,

Baby Luna is scheduled for delivery on Friday.  (Unless the storm that brought this morning’s snow also brings us a baby before then.)  While I am elated at being released from what my friend Melissa calls “House Arrest”, and I can’t wait to snuggle my new baby, I would be lying if I didn’t admit to being a little anxious about what will change.


This is the last time our family will number 7.

This is the last time I will ever be pregnant.

Last time to feel a baby kick and move inside me.

Last time to bond with Kenny over a new life that we created.

Last time to be pampered at the Women’s Center.

Last two nights of decent sleep, at least for the next few months.  🙂

Last time wearing maternity clothes.  (I can’t say I’m too sad about this one.)

Last c-section and recovery.  (I can definitely say I’m not heartbroken about this one.)


There are a lot of other things I’ll miss about my life the way it is right now.  I’m sure that several of those will include doing things with two hands, showering regularly, and not having to take a double stroller everywhere.  However, when I think about all I get to look forward to (a new baby, nighttime feeding sessions that are exclusively ours, a new baby, our completed eternal family, and have I mentioned a new baby?), those little things seem trivial in comparison.


As much as I love being pregnant (and really, I do!), there is nothing like holding– or, in my case, seeing over the surgery curtain– your brand new baby, knowing that it came from a divine place, and realizing that it is yours.  Yours to love, to nurture, to bless, and to teach.


So, while there are a lot of “lasts” in my immediate future, there are equally as many beginnings in store.


Here’s to our new family… a family of 8.



Tonight’s sleep disruption brought to you by Duracel. Also, First Alert. February 13, 2013

Filed under: Uncategorized — Kemi @ 12:57 pm
Tags: , , ,

Last week, Anthony helped me put in new batteries in our smoke alarms.  (Notice how I didn’t say “replace”?  I figured they actually had to have had batteries IN  them at some point in the past two years to qualify as being replaced.)  I didn’t think I’d have to give them another thought until August, when we were due to repeat the process.


And then, sometime after 1 am this morning, the beeping started.


[As a side note:  What is with smoke alarm batteries failing in the middle of the night?  Seriously?  You can’t hold it together for another four hours, until we’re all awake and I don’t want to bash you with a hammer?  Or a Tonka truck?  I HATE you, smoke alarms.  You too, batteries!]


I heard it on my second trip to the bathroom, and pretended I didn’t.  It took me a little bit longer to fall asleep after my fourth trip, because I started counting “one-Mississippi, two-Mississippi” between chirps.  Some chirps were 20 Mississippis, while others were 6 or 7.  (This lends credence to my theory that smoke alarms are very much alive and inherently evil, since they not only choose to go off in the middle of the night, but have a way of controlling the intervals between chirps.  This would also explain why every time I go downstairs to figure out which battery needs replacing, the stupid thing is silent until I’m halfway up the stairs.  I am 6 1/2  months pregnant.  Also, I am not a ninja.  I refuse to dive into every doorway, hoping to catch the offending alarm before it finishes its masochistic “CHIRP!”)  


At some point, I fell asleep again, and forgot all about the beeping until SOMEONE  *coughLunacough*  thought it would be funny to use my bladder as a trampoline.  I dragged myself to the bathroom one more time, and listened to the chirp find its way up the stairs, around the corner, through the kitchen, down the hallway, and into my head.  I used a pillow to muffle the persistent sound, and slept semi-peacefully until morning.


This morning, I have been downstairs half a dozen times, and I can’t figure out which alarm is having issues.  I have stood in every room, next to every alarm, pressed “test” repeatedly, and still–  nothing.  I’m about ready to pull all the batteries out and leave the empty alarms behind, just so the beeping will stop.  


And suddenly, just like that, I remember why none of my alarms have had batteries in them for a long, long, LONG time…


Of wardrobe woes and whales (and wails!) April 12, 2011

Filed under: husbands,Kenny,marriage — Kemi @ 11:22 am
Tags: , , ,

Reason 2, 416,873 I adore my husband:


I am seven months pregnant, and have been wearing the same tired maternity clothes for the past six months (never again will I sacrifice the style I barely had in a regular wardrobe for the comfort of soft, stretchy elastic-waist pants of the maternity sort until I ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO) (my children find it HILARIOUS that my waistbands creep up to my bra line in the front, not unlike like a bloated Ed Grimley)

Isn't this an image you wish you could erase from your memory?

and I am pretty tired of everything I fit into, at this point.  But as I was getting dressed today, my husband, who rarely takes notice of such things, clapped his hands together and said, “That is SUCH a cute outfit!  How come you haven’t worn that before?”


I may or may not have responded by sobbing gratefully in his arms, and covering his face with kisses.  Because a) he noticed!;  and b) he said something!;  and c) maybe I haven’t (completely) lost my (tiny) sense of fashion, even with a maternity wardrobe sadly out of date;  and d) he said I looked cute, instead of how I really look, which is like a beached whale.


It was a good morning…  until I walked into the kitchen, and one of my little darlings had to point out that my skirt was at least five inches shorter in the front than in the back.


I’m going to blame my bra.  I think it must be hungry for elastic-waist maternity clothes.  (At least one of us is enjoying them.)    😀


A Thanksgiving Surprise! November 26, 2010

Filed under: family,kids — Kemi @ 12:18 am
Tags: , , ,

I am grateful for my family this Thanksgiving season.

I am ESPECIALLY grateful for the extra place we’ll get to set at our table for next Thanksgiving.
(July 1, 2011, but probably not past June 19.)


The Toddler Rules April 25, 2008

Filed under: kids,motherhood,parenting — Kemi @ 8:37 pm
Tags: , , ,

If it is on, I must turn it off.
If it is off, I must turn it on.
If it is folded, I must unfold it.
If it is a liquid, it must be shaken, then spilled.
If it a solid, it must be crumbled, chewed or smeared.
If it is high, it must be reached.
If it is shelved, it must be unshelved.
If it is pointed, it must be run with at top speed.
If it has leaves, they must be picked.
If it is plugged, it must be unplugged.
If it is not trash, it must be thrown away.
If it is in the trash, it must be removed, inspected, and thrown on the floor.
If it is closed, it must be opened.
If it does not open, it must be screamed at.
If it has drawers, they must be rifled.
If it is a pencil, it must write on the refrigerator, monitor, or table.
If it is full, it will be more interesting emptied.
If it is empty, it will be more interesting full.
If it is a pile of dirt, it must be laid upon.  Or eaten.  Or put into pockets to save for later.
If it is stroller, it must under no circumstances be ridden in without protest. It must be pushed by me instead.
If it has a flat surface, it must be banged upon.
If Mommy’s hands are full, I must be carried.
If Mommy is in a hurry and wants to carry me, I must walk alone.
If it is paper, it must be torn into miniscule pieces, then thrown in the air like confetti.
If it has buttons, they must be pressed.
If the volume is low, it must go high.

If the volume is high, it must go low.
If it is toilet paper, it must be unrolled on the floor.
If it is a drawer, it must be pulled open, then slammed closed, repeatedly and with great force.
If it is a toothbrush, it must be inserted into my mouth.
If it has a faucet, it must be turned on at full force.
If it is a phone, I must talk to it.
If it is a bug, it must be swallowed.
If it doesn’t stay on my spoon, it must be dropped on the floor.
If it is not food, it must be tasted.
If it IS food, it must not be tasted.
If it is dry, it must be made wet with spit, milk, or toilet water.
If it is a carseat, it must be protested with arched back and ear-piercing shrieks.

If it is Mommy, it must be hugged and/or head-butted at full speed.




     I think we experienced every single thing on this list today, and some of them twice. This must be why I am so exhausted all the time.  I can’t remember the day, week, or month without really having to stop and think about it (same goes for season– with the rain, snow and sunshine we’ve been getting, it could be Spring, Summer or  Winter!).  By dinnertime, I am ready to adopt a “fend-for-yourself” menu which consists of opening the fridge and cupboards and letting them forage for edible items.  (Miracle Whip and jelly, huh?  And you’re dipping the Cheetos into it?  Go for it.)  The bedtime routine has flown out the window, because, to be perfectly honest, as long as there are bodies in beds and they are at rest, I could care less if their teeth are brushed or if they are wearing pajamas.


     Wow, the last time I felt so wiped out I had the Super Flu, and the time before that, I was….  oh, crap.